Jesse

Josip Novakovich’s “Fiction Writer’s Workshop” book suggests an exercise to help you practice your fiction writing. You’re to take a snapshot of something you’ve seen and/or heard, and produce a fictional scene from it. The fictional scene below is based on a bit of overheard dialogue (the first quoted line) and a lot of imagination about what went behind it. The names, too, are imaginary (as far as I know).

Jesse dropped his newspaper on the table and looked at the others. They looked up from their eggs and bacon. Frank sipped his coffee.

“Says here this man got 18 years for killin’ his wife and kids,” Jesse announced. “Ask me, that’s better than payin’ child support.”

The others looked at each other and they saw they were all thinking the same thing. What a jerk. But he’s the boss, so what can we do? The waitress, wearing a red plaid uniform skirt and carrying a steaming pot of coffee, stepped over to their table.

“Can I freshen anyone up?”

Jesse looked up and smiled. “Me, honey.” His eyes traced her figure from neck to knees. He rubbed a palm on his jeans.

She stepped closer and tilted the coffee pot toward his cup. Jesse’s hand reached out toward her skirt. She stepped back out of reach. Jesse’s hand dropped to his lap. A smile flashed briefly on his lips. She stepped forward again and started to pour, but stopped when his hand moved toward her.

She put her left hand on her hip, and cocked her head to one side. “It’s hard to pour when I’m trying to stay away from your hand!”

“Honey, it ain’t nothing us truckers don’t do every day.”

She scowled at Jesse. “Well, you’re not doing it to me!” She walked over to the manager, who was now glancing at their table every few seconds.

Frank glared. “Why do you have to be like that, Jesse?”

The others’ eyes widened. Did he really say that?

Jesse glared, and made a noise like air escaping from a truck’s breaks. He sipped his coffee. His upper lip wrinkled.

“It’s cold.” He put the mug down and pushed it away.

“If you hadn’t tried to grope her, she’d have warmed it up.”

“Just havin’ a little fun, Frank.”

Frank looked down at his plate and moved the eggs around with his fork. If I didn’t need this job…

Jesse chuckled. “You sound like my ex-wife…”

Frank’s face reddened. “Well, it wasn’t your ex-wife that got caught in bed with that stripper from Rascals, was it?”

“Lorraine had it comin’.”

“How do you figure that, exactly?” He stared directly into Jesse’s eyes. He had to hear the old man wiggle out of this one.

“Wouldn’t give me any. Had to get it somewhere.”

Frank rolled his yes. The others hung their heads. “She was eight months pregnant, Jesse. Came in the front door holding your two-year-old daughter, pregnant with your son, and found you banging a stripper on the couch. Classy.”

“A man’s got needs. You wouldn’t know about that, I expect.”

Frank wanted to jump across the table and beat some sense into the old man, but it wasn’t worth it. He’d lose the job. The way the economy was, he might not find another for a while. With so many people out of work, no one was buying much, so there wasn’t much need for truckers to haul things around. He needed to calm down. He took a deep breath and released it slowly.

“Don’t you think Lorraine had needs, too?”

“I don’t know what she needed, but I know what she’s been gettin’ for the last ten years. Eight hundred bucks a month of my money. Can’t wait for them damned kids to turn eighteen and the court’s off my back.”

“They’re your kids, Jesse!”

“How do I know that?” Jesse stood up. “It’s time to get outta here. Frank, you’re haulin’ that load of manure up to Riley Farms. Joe, them TVs for Big Buy are yours. Marsha, I don’t have to tell YOU what to do.”

“No… Answer the phone, keep the books, and deposit the checks.”

“That’s right, darlin’. Lose a few pounds and maybe I can find something better for you to do.” He winked at her and grinned.

Pig! They picked up their bills, and walked to the cashier.

The waitress looked over at the empty table. Three of the place settings had tips next to them. Next to the fourth there was only a newspaper.

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Putting my Writing Knowledge into Practice

Knowledge without practice makes but half an artist.
(old proverb)

Writing is something I’ve always enjoyed. In high school and college, I wrote some poems and short stories that I was proud of. When I started working, most of that writing stopped. I spent most of my work days from 1987 to 1996 writing technical and marketing documents, so going home to write more didn’t sound like fun. I bought a few books on writing during those years, but wrote very little. By the time I changed jobs in 1996, I had gotten out of the habit of writing for myself. Occasionally, an idea came to mind but I never did anything with it.

Last summer, at the Origins Game Convention in Columbus, I was feeling the urge to “create” something. I decided to sit in on a writing seminar by Michael A. Stackpole entitled “The Rules of Writing”. It was a great seminar and gave me the writing bug again. A month later, at Gen Con 2009, I attended more writing seminars. I got so wrapped up in the idea of writing, I almost forgot about gaming.

In November, I took a much bigger step. I took part in the National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) contest online. I didn’t start until about a week into the month, but still managed to crank out my 50,000 words of fiction by the end of the month. It was the closest I’d ever come to actually finishing a novel!

Since then, I dusted off those writing books I bought 20 years ago and started reading them. I attended a few seminars at the game conventions this year. I bought a few of the documents offered by the authors teaching the seminars, and read those, too. I’ve learned a great deal from material written by several published authors, including Michael Stackpole, James N. Frey, Josip Novakovich, Orson Scott Card, and others. I suspect that if I were to go back and rewrite my 2009 NaNoWriMo book, it would be considerably better today.

One thing all the authors have suggested is that reading other novels is key to learning to write your own novels, so I’ve read a few of those in the last few months as well. I’ve recently read Aaron Allston’s “Doc Sidhe“, Michael Stackpole’s “Talion: Revenant” and “I, Jedi“, Chelsea Handler’s “Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang“, and some others. I’ve found my iPod Touch very useful for this (since it fits in my pocket and goes everywhere with me, I can read any time I find myself not doing something else).

I started looking at software designed to help novelists out, things like Dramatica Pro, PlotCraft, StoryCraft, PageFour, Scrivener, yWriter, and NewNovelist. I also started gathering my favorite writing advice into a Microsoft OneNote notebook.

You’ll notice by this point that there is one thing I really haven’t done since last November… Write!

This weekend, I decided to really start fleshing out one of the story ideas I’ve had for a while now. I don’t want to spill the whole thing (because I want you to read it when I finish it), but it’s about an IT guy who stumbles on to some very nasty malware (malicious computer software) that turns out to be only the tip of a much larger iceberg. I used an old version of StoryCraft I found on eBay to help me start putting the story together, just to get a feel for that particular product. It’s been helpful in organizing my thoughts so far, but I’ve got a long way to go.

(Note: All Amazon.com links in this article include my Amazon affiliate code, which earns me a percentage of your purchases there – without changing the price you pay. If that idea upsets you, delete the part of the url that includes “mikesalsbusbl-20″ and you should be good to go.)

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Notes from Stackpole’s “Writing in the Post-Paper Era”

At Gen Con 2010, I attended one of author Michael A. Stackpole’s seminars entitled “Writing Success in the Post-Paper Era”. The seminar description mentions that Stackpole was “the first author to offer fiction on the iPhone/iPod Touch through Apple’s App Store” and that he would give attendees “an up to date look at the digital revolution and explain how you can profit and develop your career”. He definitely delivered on that. Below are my notes:

  • For every hardcopy book sold, two are printed.
  • The economics of publishing are such that if 25% of the copies of a book sold are digital, publishers will drop the paper version.
  • If you intend to make a living writing, you need a professional web site, a Facebook presence, and a Twitter feed. All of these will help get your name out there and draw people to your work.
  • If you do a blog, everything you write, tweet, or post on Facebook should be entertaining. It should also be positive, and professional. All of these things become part of your image, and you want to present the image of an entertaining professional with a pleasant personality. If you come across as a moody jerk, a loser, or a person who sulks over all their rejection slips, that’s not going to help your reputation.
  • You should be able to generate 500 words on pretty much any topic and make it entertaining. If you can’t, you probably shouldn’t be looking at writing as a career.
  • A good, professional WordPress design will cost you $150-200. You should consider that an investment in your future, and not go with one of the free, cookie-cutter themes on the web. (Like the one I’m using here, I guess…)
  • Buy domain names for yourself, your main character names, and book titles. That will make it easier for people to find your site and your work.
  • Mr. Stackpole uses Zen Cart on his site to handle payments and shopping cart duty.
  • Paypal can provide a good payment option for customers. Make sure you get a merchant account with them, though.
  • Put writing samples on your web site. This will help readers who are new to you decide whether or not to buy your work.
  • Non-technical documents/books priced at over $10 will pretty much not sell as e-books.
  • Pricing recommendations based on his experience: $2 for up to 10,000 words. $3 for 10-40,000 words. $5 for 50,000+ words.
  • He recommends a metric over “word count divided by 10,000″ to represent “hours of reading enjoyment” for your work. Price based on that metric and describe your content in that terminology. The term “pages” doesn’t really apply in a digitial setting. Even describing in “word count” doesn’t work. What you’re really selling is the hours of enjoyment someone will get from your work.
  • Consumers tend to be more concerned about the time cost of entertainment than the money cost.
  • We’ll start seeing more digital serial stories in the future, similar to TV episodes, that are sold for casual reading sessions and priced as above.
  • The three main formats you should consider publishing your works in: PDF (optional), ePub (works for all devices except Kindle), and Kindle format. Those three formats should cover just about any e-reader your customer might have.
  • Stackpole recommends “Legend Maker” software on the Mac for creating the eBooks.
  • At some point there is probably going to be a “big collapse” of traditional publishing. Until then you have no reason not to submit your work to traditional publishers.
  • Physical books will drive readers to your web site. That’s good. You get money from your web site faster. Publishers tend to pay 6-9 months after the sale of the book. Payment tends to be around $1.35 from the sale of a $10 paperback. Sell a $2 short story through your web site, and you’ll pocket around $1.67… so digital publishing is a better deal for the author. More money, sooner.
  • As far as editing and proofing services, for a short story, it’s sufficient to have another writer look it over. For a novel, hire a freelance editor.
  • A good strategy for offering samples on your site: Put up installments of a serial story free. Take them down after a week or two. Put up the next installment. Near the end, offer a digitial omnibus collection of the entire series, including the as-yet-unpublished installments. People will buy them to get the parts they’re missing and read the parts not available yet.
  • In the digital age, there are no “established authors” anymore. You are as established as your web store.

Mr. Stackpole offers a “Digital Career Guide” for $30 through his web store that offers more detail, recommendations, and information. I purchased a copy at Gen Con but haven’t read it yet. I hope to publish a review when I do.

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Notes on Creating Conflict in a Novel

While attending Gen Con 2010 this year, I attended the “Creating Conflict” panel in the writer’s track. The panelists included Anton Strout, Chris Pierson, Brad Beaulieu, and John Helfers. The seminar description was:

Make war, not peace! Ruffle the feathers of your characters. Stir the pot of emotions. Add a fistfight or two. Craft a clever and entertaining argument among your heroes. Not all conflict has to be bloody or increase the body count, but it does have to keep the reader turning the pages. Our panelists discuss the art of adding a dash of conflict to your pages.

Below are my notes from the seminar:

  • Conflict drives everything in a book.
  • Conflict happens whenever two or more characters (or forces, or philosophies) are in opposition.
  • Conflict should build over the course of the story, starting small and growing larger.
  • It’s important that you, and your reader, understand “the bad guy” and why that person does what they do. You don’t have to AGREE with the villain, just understand what makes them do what they do. Few, if any, human beings are intentionally “evil”.
  • The term “psychometry” refers to knowing the history of an object at first touch. (One of the authors used that in a story. Sounded interesting to me so I made a note of it.)
  • Having characters make the wrong choice because of their personalities can help build conflict.
  • In achieving a goal, the character should try an easy or obvious solution, but fail. Then try a harder solution, and fail… and so on until the goal is achieved.
  • Consequences of characters’ choices and actions should be explored. They might achieve their goal, but at what cost?
  • Characters (and by extension, the reader) may not know the “right choice” for solving a problem.
  • The two important points to consider in a conflict: What are the stakes? Why should we care?
  • Conflict should be meaningful and advance the plot.
  • Conflict should start as early as possible in the story.
  • During action scenes (like fights), you want a level of descriptive detail that is appropriate to what a character in that situation might actually notice. For example, during a frantic martial arts battle, we shouldn’t see something like this:

The blow connected with Fred’s chin, knocking his head back. As his face turned toward the ceiling, Fred noticed the wallpaper border around it. The pattern looked familiar somehow. Of course! It was the same border his mother had put around the walls in their home on the Cape. He wondered if he would ever get back to that house. The summers there were so relaxing…

(A sequence like the above would stop the action DEAD in the story, and it’s unlikely anyone in the middle of a fight is going to reminisce about wallpaper and summer homes from their childhood. They might think back to a similar hit from a previous battle and how they reacted, but even that recollection is likely to be short and to the point.)

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Writing Advice from Bestselling Author Michael A. Stackpole

At Origins and Gen Con 2009, I had the opportunity to attend seminars on writing provided by New York Times bestselling author Michael A. Stackpole. Mr. Stackpole appeared at Origins 2010 as well, and once more I had the opportunity to learn from him. As always, his seminars were very informative and professionally delivered.

Due to (in my opinion) a poorly publicized seminar schedule at Origins, Mr. Stackpole’s seminars were poorly attended this year. I only found out about them when I saw him in the Exhibit Hall signing autographs. Had I not seen him there, I would have had no idea he was even at Origins. His seminars weren’t listed on the site where other seminars and events were listed.

For Mr. Stackpole’s “Serial Fiction” seminar, I was the only attendee for the first half or so. Ever the professional, he gave the seminar anyway and I eagerly listened. Later, others showed up. Here’s what I took away from that seminar:

  • In a typical series of stories, 70% of the material is “case work” – or material that is there as part of the current story only. It isn’t used or referred to again in the series. The other 30% is “soap opera” material, or material that shows the growth of the main character(s) over the series and provides a “pay off” for series readers who stick with it.
  • Rex Stout’s Nero Wolfe mysteries are a good example of series fiction
  • Case characters grow much faster in serial fiction than the “mythos” (main) character
  • You need to plan out ahead how many stories/books you’re going to have. You also want to have some vague idea what’s in them, so you can plant clues in the earlier books to use later.
  • When planting details in the early books, try to avoid too many concrete details. Say “I came from a big family” rather than “I have 2 sisters and 4 brothers” because you may find when you get to the book where you plan to use that fact, it might make more sense to have 3 sisters or 3 brothers instead.
  • Keep track of your world details in a file, even for background characters. That way you’ll know what you’ve established already as you go along, and you won’t have to go back to find out those details later.
  • It’s not necessary in serial fiction to “dot every i” or “cross every t” as far as sub-plots go. It’s OK to leave the reader wondering what happened to a minor character or plot line.
  • “Soap opera” material should appear in the middle of your main story
  • In a 10-part story, the breakdown should be something like this:
    Parts 1-2: Case material
    Part 3: A storyline
    Part 4: More case material
    Part 5: B storyline is resolved
    Part 6: More case material
    Part 7: A storyline
    Parts 8-9: Case material
    Part 10: resolve the case and the A storyline
  • Remember that every story in your series is the “first story” to some reader. Make sure that you plant enough information in each story that a reader can pick it up and get up to speed with just that story.
  • You may be tempted to do a 100% mythos story, where you explore a “what if” scenario for your main character or resolve some issue from their past. This generally isn’t a good idea. It tends to result in too much change for the character to keep them viable or too little story to keep readers interested. Fan fiction is a possible exception.
  • Something Mr. Stackpole has done is publish a serial fiction line in ten 1,000 word sections on his web site. This collection of ten stories is approximately “novel-size” and is bundled together and published as a single book or collection. If you start selling the collection before you publish the last stories in the series, some readers will buy the collection to read those last stores (even if you give them away on your web site).
  • Burn Notice on USA Network is a good example of series writing, because about 70% of each episode is case material and about 30% of it is “mythos” material. Each season has an “up or down” feel to it.

In his seminar on “21 ways to kill a novel”, Mr. Stackpole provided plenty of useful advice:

  • Writing to a fad is a bad idea. By the time you recognize a fad, the market is usually saturated.
  • Look for “evergreen” areas like Tolkien-style fantasy, “pet fantasy” (kid with a psychic link to an animal), or time travel stories.
  • Don’t write things you don’t enjoy reading. Readers will sense it.
  • Make sure you do market research in the field you’re choosing to write in. Read the current leaders in that field. See how they tell stories, what they include in the stories, and from this develop a picture of what the audience expects from your story.
  • Have a long-term career plan. Know what you’re writing next.
  • Make sure your characterization is good. Having no (or poor) characterization is the number one way to kill a novel. Write at least two sentences about each character that describes them one way, and one that goes against that. (Example: “Dave was an expert sailor and navigator. Unfortunately, he was unable to swim.”)
  • Give readers enough time to connect with your characters, or you will distance the reader from them. You want the reader to feel like they can see inside the character’s head, especially if they’ll be a viewpoint character. Introduce them early on.
  • In every book, you need at least one “normal” character, or someone who is relatively normal. If you don’t, readers will have difficulty gauging how “crazy” the other characters really are.
  • Don’t bounce the point of view around. This disorients the reader.
  • No “tin” dialogue. Dialogue has to be appropriate to the character, the setting of the novel, and the situation. Listen to how real people talk in a similar situation. Don’t repeat things in the dialogue that you say in the narrative.
  • Let the characters decide what’s going to happen, not the author. If the story in your novel appears to die out, go back about 7,000 words. Somewhere around there you’ll probably find that you made the character do something he or she would never have done. Once you fix that, you’ll be able to move ahead.
  • Characters have to take responsibility for their actions and there must be consequences to the choices they make.
  • Characters should grow, not just change. Growth is an attempt to alter behavior based on external factors, and the change made through growth is permanent. It may be some type of experimentation. It may even be a decision not to change something if that change would take the character away from who they are.
  • “Nobody cries over change.” but they might cry during growth.
  • Make sure the story has an emotional “heart”. Show the characters reacting to the good and bad things that happen, and how the events affected them.
  • Predictability = Boredom
  • Your story must have a plot. Even if people don’t like your characters, they must be able to latch onto your plot. If they can’t, they’ll walk away from the story.
  • If your research activities are stopping you from writing, you’re doing too much research.
  • Don’t “file the serial numbers off someone else’s novel”. Don’t just re-tell a Shakespeare story. You want the reader to say “I didn’t expect THAT to happen!” or “I’ve never seen THAT before!”
  • Make sure you examine the consequences of things in your stories. If you have a device in your story that replicates physical objects easily and cheaply, there’s a definite impact on the economy in that world.
  • Things in the story, like character and place names, should fit together and flow well.
  • Think about how you choose to name things. The word “pope” has a particular meaning to Catholics, but not to other religions. The word “elder” means something to Mormons. The word “league” in reference to measurement has a specific meaning.
  • Make sure the cultures and subcultures in your world get along.
  • Sticking to your original outline can kill your novel. Make sure you give it a chance to grow naturally.
  • Make sure you have an appropriate head-heart-hand mix. The “head” is the puzzle part of the story. The “heart” is the emotional core. The “hand” is the action.
  • Try to have sentences of 12 words or less.
  • “Show” as much action as possible and “tell” very little.
  • Be careful with math and units of measure.
  • Make sure the mechanics in the story are right. Don’t have characters putting tinfoil in the microwave or talk about the “hammer” on a pistol that uses clips.
  • Don’t give an editor the opportunity to say “no” to your novel.
  • Don’t revise as you go. Wait until you have the draft finished.

If you found any of this useful, you’ll undoubtedly like the various writing tips and guides Mr. Stackpole sells through his web store. I’ve purchased a few of these in the past and found them very useful. They generally include a bit more information than is communicated in the seminar, and are distributed in PDF format – which makes them easy to adapt to electronic readers like the iPhone, iPod, iPad, Kindle, and others.

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Writing Advice from Bestselling Author Aaron Allston

While at the Origins 2010 game fair, I had the opportunity to attend some writing seminars by New York Times bestselling author Aaron Allston. Mr. Allston has published many novels, including a variety of novels for the Star Wars and Terminator franchises, as well as his own “Doc Sidhe” series. On Mr. Allston’s home page, he posts information about projects he’s working on and includes a link to an online store where his writing can be published in eBook formats.

Here are some of the bits of advice Mr. Allston shared during his “Style and Mood” seminar:

  • Write all the way through a novel or story from beginning to end without stopping or editing any more than absolutely necessary. This will keep you from walking away from the work or getting bored with it before it’s finished.
  • Do not set out to create “art”, especially in the beginning. Set out to tell the story you want to tell. As you perfect your craft, you’ll get better and your work will begin to approach what others (and you) will see as “art”. If you set out to create “art” you’ll never achieve it, always comparing the work you’re doing to some lofty goal.
  • A genre is a way of deliberately limiting your writing to appeal to a specific subset of people. This is why some literature teachers don’t see science-fiction as art, as it isn’t designed to appeal to “everyone” but just to fans of that kind of work.
  • Mr. Allston recommends watching the show Dexter as an example about someone who is trying to be “human” and isn’t.
  • Avoid writing “the shocking truth”. He gave an example from a news story about a woman who had been attacked with an ice pick and didn’t realize it until she got home, when she discovered “the shocking truth” that there was an ice pick stuck in her back. This kind of phrasing is trying to tell the reader (or viewer) how to react to the story, rather than sharing the facts and letting the reader react based on that.
  • Avoid the use of adverbs and adjectives like “the pain was excruciating”. That’s not a very clear image. What is “excruciating” exactly? Better to use a description like “it was like having someone scrape off part of a vertbrae with a file”. We may not have a good mental image of “excruciating” but we can probably envision that “scraping” example very clearly.
  • Similarly, if someone is described as wearing “red shoes” it may be accurate, but if there isn’t more to the selection of the color than that, it’s a useless detail. Why did the person choose red shoes? What do those red shoes make the people around the wearer think of them? Is the wearer tasteless? Is the wearer trying to attract attention?
  • When you’re reviewing and editing your work, look at every adverb and adjective. Consider replacing it with an expansion like the “scraping” example above. Don’t do too many of those, however. Maybe 1-2 per chapter of a novel is enough.
  • Mr. Allston feels that Robert Heinlein was a master of brevity in dialogue and description.
  • Manage dialogue without any euphemisms for “said”, such as shouted, uttered, murmured, or “ejaculated”. Find other ways to let the reader know who is speaking, such as the characters’ word choice, sentence structure, or dialect.
  • If you have written a scene and there is unwanted emotion in it (e.g., the bad guy looks more sympathetic than the hero), use the “Perry Mason” technique. In that show, the victim of a murder is always depicted as a bad person, so that the audience and the other characters in the story don’t get too upset about them dying. By making the victim appear to be “awful” you can remove the emotional reaction to their death. Similarly, you can downplay any emotional reaction by offsetting it with other feelings.
  • Humor is anything that tends to make people laugh. Comedy is a genre, where there tends to be a setup and a punchline. People in a comedy say and do things just to set up the joke, things that a normal person in that situation might not do.
  • During action sequences, sentence and paragraph length should be shorter. Descriptions should be the minimum necessary to depict what is going on.
  • If you use time dilation (making something appear to happen in slow motion), don’t overdo it. A paragraph or two at the most should accomplish what you need. Even if the hypothetical time dilation continues on for quite a while, it’s not advisable to continue it in the text.
  • There shouldn’t be large blocks of dialogue during action scenes.
  • In an action scene, if a character is doing something unexpected or unusual, provide only the minimum amount of exposition necessary to explain the action. For example, if a pacifist picks up a gun, show them hesitating to do it but realizing it’s necessary to protect a loved one, then move on to pulling the trigger.

During his seminar on plot analysis, Mr. Allston provided information including the following:

  • The “point” of your story should be something you can express in a very short sentence, like “Family pride leads to murder.”
  • The “themes” of your story are ideas that you explore or express during the course of the story. These can generally be summed up in a single word, and there should be from 1 to 5 in a story.
  • “Arcs” (usually character arcs) are the personal progression of a character, from the beginning to the end of the story. These should not be an external change, like a new job, but a deeper and more profound internal change (like Scrooge going from a grouchy old miser to a decent, generous guy).
  • “Scenes” or “Events” are things that happen in a story in a confined space and time with specific characters involved. If you change the location, it’s a new scene. Change the time period, it’s a new scene.
  • If a scene in the story isn’t accomplishing something to move the story along, it should go.
  • Scenes in a story generally do one or more of the following:
    • Establish characters: Their conflicts, names, descriptions, etc.
    • Establish facts: Any back-story, history, off-screen events that happen, or time-critical information getting to characters
    • Reiterate or Re-establish facts that were already established, such as showing a subtle fact seen earlier more clearly, or allowing characters who weren’t present earlier to learn of a fact and react to it
    • Point to the future: foreshadowing and scenes that set up a situation now for a pay-off later (e.g., picks up some papers and later finds a winning lottery ticket in them)
    • Complicate matters: Add obstacles the slow things down, or a “quest” that the character must finish to get something needed to resolve the main conflict. These can also include “reversals” where we learn that something isn’t what we thought it was (e.g., drug dealer is really an undercover cop).
    • Move things along, facilitating progress in the main story: This can (and where appropriate should) include the character looking at the options to solve his or her problem and choosing one, with the possible repercussions of the choice spelled out.
    • Reposition characters: Move them physically or emotionally where you need them. For example, getting them on a bus so they’re across town at the right time, or having them get bad news that makes them sad at a critical time.
    • Address one of the themes: For example, if “loyalty” is a theme, test a character’s loyalty in some way.
    • Address the point of the story: For example, show the good guy becoming corrupted.
    • Address a character arc: A spineless character has to make a choice that helps him grow, or chooses the wimpy option and sets himself up for failure later. Characters should, by the way, fail in at least some scenes. If they always win, it becomes melodramatic.
    • Wrap things up: resolve a sub-plot, resolve the main plot, or reveal something like a character realizing he no longer wants the thing he’s been pining for the entire novel. Deliver a pay-off from an earlier scene. Give emotional closure.
  • Having multiple purposes to a scene can misdirect the reader. You can introduce something seemingly minor (e.g., an unplugged clock radio) that comes into play later (e.g., character is unsure of the time something happened).
  • During your review of the story, analyze each scene. Does it accomplish something? Can you hide additional things in the scene for a pay-off later? Should there be more action or a theme expressed? Does the scene accomplish “enough” to move the story along?
  • Good examples of plotting include: The Godfather 1 and 2, It’s a Wonderful Life, and “A Man of Prosperity”
  • An example of how a scene can serve multiple purposes… Imagine that you’ve established that Kate and Jack are a married couple. Jack lost his job and is forced to work a crummy part-time job that he hates. Kate is the major breadwinner. Each night, she comes home from work, takes a nap, wakes up, fixes them dinner, they talk for a bit, and go to bed. One day, Kate wakes up to find her alarm clock didn’t go off. It’s not completely unplugged but it’s unplugged enough to be “off”. It’s dark, and she hasn’t fixed Jack’s dinner yet. She comes out and finds him watching his favorite show. She apologizes to him. He blows up. He follows her around berating her. At one point, he grabs an old clock off the wall, shoves it in her face, and asks her if she sees what time it is. Tells her he’s been waiting around for her. Smashes the clock over her head. In fear, she runs to the bedroom and locks herself in.

    What did this scene accomplish for the story? It depicts Jack’s chauvenism, his tendency toward violence, and the couple’s rocky relationship. It showed a fight between the couple. It also establishes something more subtle: the time that the fight took place. Jack showed her the clock before smashing it, so Kate saw the time. Imagine now that Jack’s boss, whom he hates, shows up later in the story as murdered on that day and time. Kate believes she knows where he was. But does she? Her alarm clock was unplugged. Jack could have set any time he wanted on the smashed clock before she saw it. The show he was watching could have been on his DVR or VCR. The scene also therefore establishes reasonable suspicion in Kate’s mind that her husband might be the killer. The reader will likely focus on the argument and violence, not thinking about the time on the smashed clock or the unplugged alarm clock until much later.

I thought Mr. Allston did a great job explaining his points and providing concrete examples of what he meant by each point.

I look forward to learning more from him at a future seminar.

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NaNoWriMo 2009 – Winner!

NaNoWriMo.org Winner logoIt’s November 29, 2009, and I’ve just completed over 50,000 words toward a fantasy novel I’ve tentatively titled “Rogue Mage”. Having reached 50,000 words before the end of November, I’m now a 2009 NaNoWriMo Winner!

The novel I’ve been furiously writing this month is set in a medieval fantasy world, very loosely based on medieval England. It focuses on two characters, Felicia Rothban and Aaron Blackwell.

Felicia, in her youth, was a very stunning woman. She was also somewhat shallow, and used her looks to seduce men who were handsome, powerful, and/or rich. Felicia was also quite crazy about flowers. While having a relationship with a powerful mage (wizard, magic user, etc.), Felicia’s window box full of flowers began to die. The mage, Eldren, cast a couple of spells that brought her beloved flowers back to health. He then went off to battle, and the flowers died. When he returned from battle, Felicia was mourning the death of her flowers. She begged, pleaded, and finally seduced him into teaching her enough magic to keep the flowers alive.

Eldren took quite a risk doing this. In the Realm, all magic users must belong to the Mage’s Guild. The Guild is a powerful organization chartered by the king, to recruit, train, and police magic users. They do not tolerate people outside the Guild practicing any sort of magic. The punishment for teaching magic to a non-Guild-member is death. The punishment for knowing magic outside the Guild is death. Eldren makes Felicia well aware of the risk they are both taking. Apart from the spells he knows for keeping plants healthy, the only magic Eldren shares with Felicia is a spell to heal injury to human beings. This he taught her to help keep her alive.

Felicia later left Eldren for someone more wealthy and powerful, a Lord Clemmons. Clemmons was a married man, but promised to marry Felicia when he ended the relationship with his wife. He bought Felicia a small cottage in a remote farming village and asked her to wait there for his return. Years passed with no word from Clemmons. Felicia was destitute and had no way back to Capitol City, where she’d spent most of her life. She had no skills, and her beauty was beginning to fade. All she had was the magic she’d been taught. She made the best of her situation in the small farming village she’d been left in. She told the farmers she could heal their sick crops, but was a bit vague on how. They accepted her help, because she got good results and helped increase their yields. They believed she was probably a mage but she had never admitted this.

Aaron Blackwell was a young man who had grown up in this small farming village named Agrinnia. He was a smart boy, but not very coordinated or muscular. This put him at a marked disadvantage for farm work, and he was frequently bullied and ridiculed because of his physical weakness. However, Aaron’s father got him a job at the scrivener’s where he worked. Aaron spent his days copying books, contracts, and other documents for the scrivener’s customers. One day, on his way to lunch, two farm boys carry the struggling Aaron into an alley and rob him, beating him severely in the process. He stumbles into the nearby inn and collapses at a table.

Felicia walks in and sees Aaron’s state. She takes pity on him and casts a spell to heal him. When he sees her pull a scroll from a case she carries, he recognizes it as looking a lot like something he had been copying at work. He realizes the woman is a mage and the book he is currently copying must be a spellbook. He then finds a way to get a spell out of the heavily-protected shop where he works – by memorizing it. He writes it down outside the shop and starts to study it. It’s written in a language he can’t understand and uses symbols that mean nothing to him. While he’s looking over the paper, Felicia comes into the inn. She comes over to ask how he’s feeling, and sees the spell. She turns white and tells him he must hide it immediately. He asks why. She explains that if he’s seen in possession of this paper by a Guild mage, they will most likely kill him.

Later, Felicia realizes that the best way for her to get out of town is to learn more magic. Aaron has access to a lot of it, and it’s clear he’s been getting bullied on a fairly regular basis his whole life. In exchange for the spells he can provide, she agrees to teach him how to use them. Unfortunately, because Felicia received only the most minimal training herself, they aren’t able to understand many of the spells they collect. They have to try them out and see what they do in order to determine their value. In time, they become friends and lovers.

One day, Felicia is asked by a local farm boy to help with a sick crop. She follows the boy to their farm. While walking through a barn, the boy turns and attacks her, attempting to force himself on her. She fights back, but he is too strong for her. She remembers a fear spell Aaron stole for them, and casts it on the boy. He runs out of the barn, across a field. He trips and hits his head on the stone wall around a well. She kicks him out of anger, after verifying that he’s still alive. She leaves. The boy later dies and his parents believe Felicia has murdered him. The national police force, known as the Realm Patrol, investigates. They determine the boy’s death was indeed an accident but bruises on his body match the shoes worn by Felicia. They charge her with assault and imprison her.

In prison, Felicia is visited by Eldren, the mage who taught her to cast spells. She tells him her story, including the use of the fear spell. He asks where she learned that, since he didn’t teach her. She tells him she sometimes buys spells from people who find them in a dead mage’s belongings. He doesn’t tell her, but he’s not satisfied with that explanation. He happens to be the mage who invented the fear spell and only a few others (whom he taught personally) know it. He sends an apprentice to investigate, under the guise of having a spellbook copied. Aaron copies an interesting-looking spell from this book and gives it to Felicia. She tries it out, and ends up causing a giant, brightly glowing ball of energy to appear over the forest near her home. The apprentice now knows there is a problem and returns to his master.

Eldren and three other mages return to Agrinnia. They pull Aaron from the scrivener’s shop and take him to Felicia’s home. They confront her with evidence they’ve collected. She tells them she’s been trading spells to Aaron in exchange for romantic favors, and that he knows nothing of what he’s been copying for her apart from recognizing the general look of written spells. She also points out that it was Eldren who taught her magic. The mages kill Eldren first, for violating Guild law, then kill Felicia. Aaron is allowed to live after they try to determine if he knows any magic. He finds out they got him fired. He now has no source of income and no Felicia. However, he has inherited her home. He sells it, and decides to go to Capitol City to join the Mage’s Guild, hoping to destroy it from within.

He’s admitted to the Guild and assigned to a master mage named Elric. Elric begins teaching Aaron magic, and takes him on a mission into a neighboring country. There, they need to find a way to neutralize the magic used by the local population, to pave the way for their king to invade the country.

As my 50,000th word hit, they were in the other country, posing as businessmen who hoped to make money there. They realized they would need enough month to be able to pass as wealthy businessmen, which neither had. Aaron had spent his inheritance getting to Capitol City, bribing his way into the Guild, and reaching Elric. Elric had a bit of money, but not enough to pass for a businessman. He tells Aaron the answer is to rob a secure bank in the village they’re passing through…

That’s where the story stands as of the moment… I expect to finish it some time in December, then clean it up a bit. When I think it’s at least “tolerable” to read, I’m planning to publish it as a PDF and make it available here for people to download and read. Right now, it’s incredibly rough. NaNoWriMo focuses on writing speed rather than writing quality, so my novel contains a lot of wrong turns and foreshadowing for things that I intended to write into the story and never did. If you were to read it in its current form, you’d most likely come to the conclusion that I absolutely stink as a writer… and I wouldn’t blame you. All I really have here is a very rough draft for a part of a novel, not an entire novel and certainly not a good, polished one.

In any case, NaNoWriMo was a fun experience and I look forward to participating in it again in 2010.

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I’m a NaNoWriMo Participant This Year!

NaNoWriMo Participant Logo I first heard of the National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) last year, but never bothered to investigate it or learn much about it because I figured there was no chance I’d be able to write a novel that would be worth anyone judging for a contest.

As it turns out NaNoWriMo isn’t exactly a “judged” contest. It works something like this… Starting on November 1, you begin writing a 50,000 word novel. If you complete and submit that novel by November 31, you’re considered a “winner”. You receive a “web badge” and downloadable certificate you can print out. Not exactly the greatest prizes, but there are some corporate sponsors offering nice prizes. The makers of the Macintosh writing software “Scrivener” are offering a substantial discount to the winners on December 2, 2009. An on-demand publisher will print a free “proof” copy of your book and bind it for you. They’ll also optionally help you sell it via Amazon.com and other outlets.

If you’re curious and want to check in on how I’m doing and what I’m writing, here’s my profile on the NaNoWriMo site. As of this writing, I’m way behind the goal. On the other hand, I only really started this effort on November 4, so I’m about 3-4 days behind most other participants.

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Michael A. Stackpole’s “The Rules of Writing” Seminar

Michael A. Stackpole is a fairly prolific author, having penned a large number of fantasy-themed books, Star Wars novels, Battletech novels, and other works of fiction. He’s had a long and successful career. In other words, the man knows a bit about writing. He runs a web site, stormwolf.com, where he shares (and sells) what he knows and writes. He hosted a seminar at Origins 2009 entitled “The Rules of Writing”, in which he shared his top 5 tips to help aspiring fiction writers improve their craft.

I signed up for one of his sessions. After attending, I wished I had signed up for the others. Stackpole not only understands what beginning fiction writers (and experienced ones) struggle with, he also knows how to communicate solutions to those problems effectively. I think I learned more in the 1-hour session with him than I’ve learned in all the other creative writing education I’ve had. To give you an idea what to expect, I’m going to share some of what I learned from Stackpole during his Origins 2009 session. Out of respect for the author and a desire not to infringe on his copyrights (he sells a document with his 20 rules of writing) or affect his attendance at seminars, I’m only sharing part of the information here. If you want to learn more, and get more detail, I would encourage you to visit his stormwolf.com site or attend one of his seminars.

Stackpole’s first “Rule of Writing” is “Show, Don’t Tell”. This is something you hear in many creative writing classes, but Stackpole did a great job of illustrating the impact of doing it right. For example, a beginning writer will “tell” you what is going on, such as “Tom was mad.” That definitely tells you what’s going on, but you don’t have to actually think about the words. It’s better to “show” your audience how mad Tom is, by saying something like “Tom’s face turned red. He gritted his teeth and slammed his fist on the counter.” In the second example, you have to visualize what’s going on. Not only do you get the point (“Tom is mad”), you can also picture just how mad Tom is.

Stackpole also tells writers to use “Continuity Bolts” in their work to hold the story together and make it seem real. For example, if the main character in your story visits a local bar and has a conversation with the bartender while waiting on a friend to show up, use that conversation and the bartender character elsewhere in the story. Perhaps your main character needs to go to the post office to pick up a package. While he’s waiting in line, he might see the bartender buying stamps. This makes your fictional world seem more real. Similarly, if a television in the bar talks about some news story, the main character might hear people talking about that same story in line at the post office. These elements of continuity make your fictional world seem more complete and consistent, and reward readers for paying attention.

The rule that stuck with me the most was “He said, she said”. This refers to something I’ve always struggled with when I write fiction. I knew it sounded horribly awkward, but I just couldn’t see a way around it. In about two minutes, Stackpole pushed me right past that block and helped me understand what I should do instead. Lots of beginning writers construct dialogue in their stories like this:

“I don’t like it,” Tom said. “You spend too much time at that night club.”

“Don’t be jealous,” Jane told him. “I’m only dancing and hanging out with my girlfriends.”

Tom asked, “Then why did Fred tell me he saw you sitting with that guy from Accounting?”

All that “said”, “told”, and “asked” stuff gets repetitive and irritating after a while. But how do you make it obvious who’s doing the talking? Stackpole explained that one way you can do that effectively is to give your characters a unique style of speaking. Perhaps one character never uses contractions. Maybe one uses a lot of big words, while another chooses smaller, one-syllable ones. The above example might be rewritten as:

“Ticks me off, you goin’ clubbin’ like that every night.”

“That’s silly! I only go to dance and hang out with the girls.”

“Fred saw you sittin’ with a jerk from Accountin’. Why?”

In that example, Tom tends not to say the “g” at the end of words. He also likes to use shorter, more gutteral sounding sentences. Jane uses more complete sentences and a more formal speech pattern.

Another way to identify speakers is to have them name one another, as in “Oh Tom, you’re always saying things like that.”

You can also illustrate who is speaking indirectly, by showing actions they take while they’re speaking, such as “Tom picked at his fingernails.” right before he says something.

You can also hide clues in the context of the characters’ speech, such as “Being the chief of police has its advantages, eh?” If three characters are speaking and only one is the chief of police, you know who they’re talking to. It’s also likely that the next person to speak will be that “chief of police” character. These little clues help the reader figure out who is talking, who’s listening, etc., without having to explicitly use the words “he said”, “she uttered”, “she asked”, etc.

For example, another way you might rewrite the original scene:

He gritted his teeth. “Ticks me off, you goin’ clubbin’ every night, Jane.”

“Oh, Tommy! I only go to dance and hang out with my girlfriends.”

“Fred saw you sittin’ with a jerk from Accountin’. Why?”

In the first line, we know the speaker is male, and he is talking to Jane, even if we don’t know who that speaker is. In the next line, Jane tells us it’s Tom. Now that we’ve established that Tom and Jane are talking, the third and subsequent lines can just deliver dialog until someone new enters the conversation or an existing speaker leaves.

(My examples above aren’t intended to be great writing, just quick illustrations to get the point across.)

Stackpole also shared suggestions for making scenes and dialog do “double duty” and explained the importance of researching the topics you write about. During the seminar, he recommended authors whose work provides good examples of different areas of fiction writing, such as dialogue, plotting, characterization, and

At his seminars, Stackpole sells CD-ROMs which contain PDF (Adobe Reader) files. I purchased the disc for this particular seminar. The PDF contains the 5 rules Stackpole discussed in the seminar, along with another 15. The disc also contains a copy of a back issue of his “The Secrets” newsletter that covers “timely and classic” writing issues. For example, his June 19, 2009, issue (122) discussed how to prepare documents for the Amazon Kindle device

I’m looking forward to attending Stackpole’s seminars at Gen Con Indy 2009 in August and wish him continued success in his career.

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Forging ahead…

The results of the scans done on December 26, 2008, showed that the radiation from the therapy went where it was expected to go and nowhere else. That means it’s unlikely that the cancer spread beyond my thyroid.

I’ve been on synthroid (replacement thyroid hormone) since December 22 and most of the symptoms I experienced are now gone. I still get an occasional muscle cramp or ache, but nothing like I had been seeing.

My doctor noticed that I was taking a diuretic and said that this could be the cause for the muscle cramps I had been experiencing. I’ve been off the drug for several days and the cramps have almost vanished, which is a good thing as far as I’m concerned.

My next scheduled doctor visit is at the end of February, when I presume we’ll look at thyroid hormone levels and thyroglobulin levels to establish a baseline for the next treatment steps.

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