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Talk about an unfortunate name…

October 18th, 2007

Because I run a game news site, I use Google Alerts to scan the Internet for gaming news and deliver me a list of potential articles by email each day.  Today’s list of potential material included the following listing (modified slightly to fit this site’s format) about a new Nintendo Wii (pronounced “wee”) game that cracked me up.  When I read Google’s excerpt from the article, it just got funnier:

wiiwackers.jpg

If you don’t get the joke, read this site’s entry for the word “wee” (which sounds like Wii).

Then consider the site’s definition for “whack off“.

Then put the two things together…

Then read the article excerpt for an added laugh, talking about allowing the player to have an artificial sensation based on arm and hand movement…

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Review: Stronghold 2

December 29th, 2006

Over Thanksgiving, I purchased Stronghold 2
for $19.99 from Office Max. I was in the mood for a real-time strategy
game, something a little different than my usual sci-fi fare. Stronghold
2 certainly seemed to fit that bill. It featured medieval castles,
catapults, trebuchets, archers, polemen, etc.

The graphics
in the game are 3D and more than adequate to the task. It was very easy
to tell units apart on-screen, buildings looked unique and recognizable,
etc. Rotating the camera in the game proved to be rather difficult, so I
rarely tried. It just wasn’t worth the effort.

The sounds
are also adequate and not overdone.

The controls are a bit
strange. To select a unit, you left-click on it. To move it, you
left-click where you want that unit to go. Most of the time, this works
fine. Sometimes, however, this makes it difficult to select and move
units that are located close together.

There appears to be
a “tech tree” of sorts in the game, where you can initially
make only spearmen and archers. Supposedly you can also make armored
troops, swordsmen, and a variety of others. Unfortunately the manual
doesn’t explain this well and it’s certainly not clear in playing. After
playing several levels of the single-player campaign, I still can’t make
a mounted unit or a sword-swinging unit. I’ve no idea why or how. Worse,
my AI opponents all seem to be able to produce these units in quantity,
and their units seem to take 2-3x the damage mine do before dying.

In addition to the “invisible” tech tree, the game
also suffers from a “wash, rinse, and repeat” mission design.
That is, at the start of each mission, you begin with almost nothing.
You have to scramble to gather resources, build defenses, and construct
units to defend and/or attack. Meanwhile, the computer throws wolves
(which eat archers and spearmen for breakfast), bandits (who can kill
several of your units with one of theirs), enemy forces (which can kill
several of your soldiers with one of theirs), time limits, and more at
you. Once you’ve managed to beat the level, the cut scene explains that
you’ve decided to move to another castle for the next mission (i.e.,
rinse away all your progress) where you start all over again (i.e.,
repeat).

Sometimes, the cut scenes make some very lame
excuses for the “rinse” part. For example, after fighting my
way through one map, my “character” and another decide that
they need to use their enemy’s castle because it’s better located and
will be easier to defend. Below is the castle they think will be easier
to defend:

Read more…

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Video from the Gen Con Indy 2006 Exhibit Hall

August 22nd, 2006

Below is some video I shot while at Gen Con 2006 in Indianapolis, inside the Exhibit Hall where products are bought and sold:

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The Gamer Hotsheet is Online!

July 12th, 2006

As you’ve seen from other articles on this site, I’ve been attending the Origins International Game Expo for several years now.  My interest in (non-computer and computer) gaming dates back to before high school (over 20 years if you need to know specifics).  I recently began collaborating with a friend and co-worker on a new site for (mostly non-computer) gaming called “The Gamer Hotsheet“.

The Gamer Hotsheet provides information about new board games, miniatures games, miniature figures, role-playing games, and computer games that are similar in complexity to these games.  Each day, we scour a long list of game manufacturer sites to bring you information about the latest releases, sales, etc.

If you’re interested at all in traditional gaming, check out The Gamer Hotsheet.

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Rogue Judges’ Car Wars Rogue Arena at Origins 2006

July 5th, 2006

My brother and I were fortunate enough to get into one of the
“Car Wars – Rogue Arena” games at Origins 2006.  Rogue
Judges events seem to be very well-attended, probably because the group
does a great job of running the games it does.  The GMs (game
masters) know the games well, keep a positive attitude working with
less-experienced players, have an organized system for going through
players’ turns, etc. It’s because they do such a great job that they can
effectively handle 20 players at a Car Wars
table.

Rogue Judges has a great-looking arena set
up to play the game, with buildings you can crash through, pedestrians
you shouldn’t hit, trees, overpasses, etc.  They have condensed
rule cards they use to help move things along, as well as pre-designed
cars that have comparable strengths and weaknesses.  They maintain
a good sense of humor and try to keep the game fun and realistic as they
go.  It’s for these reasons I try to sign up for one or more of
their events at Origins each year.

Rogue Judges
also does a great job of making it easy to find the games you’re trying
to play with them.  Their banner can be seen all the way across the
exhibit hall.  Once you get there, individual sheets listing the
games they’re offering and the dates/times are displayed.  Each
gaming table also has a placard telling you at a glance what game is
being played there.  Compare this to Inner City Games, whose game I
had a ticket for and couldn’t find in the Exhibit Hall, even with the
help of the HMGS folks on the stage at the front of the room (who had a
map of the place).

Read more…

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Origins 2006 – Day 1 – Thursday

June 29th, 2006

Today my brother and I attended our first day of Origins 2006.  We first played a round of the miniatures game “Injurius Games – Keep What You Kill”.  Between the two of us (and the kindness of another player), we got a full squad of soldiers.  Here’s a bit of video from that event:

 

Although the convention officially began Wednesday, there wasn’t much going on then that I was interested in.  It also appears that this is true for others as well, since (as you can see from this video of Exhibit Hall C where the miniatures gaming takes place) there weren’t very many games setup yet or many tables full:

 

 

Still, though it wasn’t that busy yet, you can see that people are having quite a good time with the games that are underway.  There’s a lot of interesting-looking terrain and table setups in place, and I’m more than a little curious to see what tomorrow’s activities will bring.  You can be sure there will be some video here tomorrow.

In the evening, we played a very well-attended Rogue Judges event, “Car Wars Rogue Arena”.  Here is a little bit of video from that:

 

 

I’ve also taken some still photos that I’ll be sharing later.

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An FTC Settlement That Wasn’t Needed

June 8th, 2006

Today, the makers of the Grand Theft Auto video game reached a settlement with the Federal Trade Commission (FTC).  This is a travesty.  This entire issue should NEVER have reached the FTC, and the members of Congress who pushed the FTC to get involved (most notably Hillary Clinton) should be ashamed of themselves.  Their complaints about this game show their ignorance and fear of technology and media.

The controversy over Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas centered on the fact that there was “adult” themed content in the game.  This content was NOT accessible to purchasers of the game as distributed by the manufacturer.  A player could only access this content if he or she made changes to the game so that it would run sections of code the manufacturer had blocked out to keep the game’s rating more appropriate for teenagers.

For those of you who don’t see why I find Hillary’s objections so offensive, let me give you an analogy.  Let us imagine that I own a beach house that I rent out to strangers 6 months a year.  In that beach house, I have a closet that I keep certain personal possessions in (e.g., toiletries, cleaning solutions, medications, etc.) since I’m there half the year.  When I’m not there, that closet is kept locked and renters are given an agreement to sign which says they’re not to go in that closet.

One of my renters has a teenage kid who figures out how to pick the lock on that closet.  Inside, he finds something that interests him.  He writes an article on his blog that tells his friends about the beach house and how to pick the lock on the storage closet.  One of his buddies visits the house, picks the lock, and takes a whole bottle of my blood pressure medicine, believing it to be something that will get him high.  He dies.

In this hypothetical example, I took reasonable precautions to protect that child.  I locked the medications away in a closet.  I made it a condition of rental that no one opens that closet.  Getting into the closet required a person to learn to pick a lock, something most people can’t do.  After the person picked the lock, they’d have to dig through some sealed boxes to even find the blood pressure medication.  I think most of us could agree that the precautions I took are quite reasonable.  Yes, I could have removed the medication from the house entirely.  And I’m sure that after hearing of the death of someone’s child, I would have wished I had.  But the bottom line here is that if people had respected my rental agreement and not bypassed the protection measures I had in place for their safety, the child wouldn’t have died.  Period.

In the “real” example of the game, purchasers of the software were given a product that was designed to work a particular way.  Out of the box, that software did not provide access to the sexual content Hillary found so objectionable.  It was, like the medication in my hypothetical example above, locked away and hidden from people.  The software’s license agreement probably contained language indicating that it was illegal to modify it, or at the very least that the manufacturer wasn’t liable if the user modified that software.  If someone got to this sexual content, they got there because they violated the license agreement and took specific actions to modify the software to make the content available. 

In retrospect, the manufacturer of GTA:SA probably wishes they had deleted the content from the game before shipping it.  But from a purely business perspective, that would have required programming changes, added costs, and delayed the release of the game into the market.  Game customers are generally not that forgiving of delays, so it might have hurt their sales.  Their decision to lock off that content was a practical and reasonable one.  It really isn’t their fault people modified their game to access content they had intentionally hidden away.

As someone who saw this hidden content, I can tell you that it was clear that the manufacturer did not intend for customers to play it.  It was buggy code and not as polished as other aspects of the game, giving a clear indication that the developers abandoned the idea of including this kind of content earlier on in the process.  If they had really intended for people to find and play it, they’d have cleaned it up and tested it more.

Personally, I think Hillary needs to keep her nose out of video games.

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Walkthrough/Solution for Johnny Rocketfingers 2

May 7th, 2006

I was reading Wired yesterday when they mentioned a Flash-based game called “Johnny Rocketfingers 2” on Newgrounds.com.  It’s a graphic adventure game that’s relatively short and a little bit challenging. I finally beat it late last night and thought I’d share the solution here in case anyone gets stuck trying to finish it.  (By the way, in case you didn’t know already, the game has very graphic depictions of violence and other objectionable content, so I don’t recommend it for anyone under the age of 18 or anyone easily offended.)

Here’s a complete walkthrough for the game:

  1. Watch opening video until you’re sitting at the bar, surrounded.
  2. Pick up bottle.
  3. Use bottle on countertop.
  4. Pick up ashes from ashtray.
  5. Use ashes on thugs.
  6. Watch cutscene.
  7. Pick up Thug, Inc. club card.
  8. Watch cutscene.
  9. Grab chain from ceiling.
  10. Grab knife from wall.
  11. Grab key and quarter from under couch.
  12. Use key on window.
  13. Get gum from under window sill.
  14. Combine gun with chain.
  15. Climb down ladder.
  16. Go on liquor store.
  17. Grab bottle of forty.
  18. Put forty in crack in wall next to game machine.
  19. Leave.
  20. Go to ladder area by parking meter.
  21. Grab forty from crack.
  22. Walk left to bum.
  23. Give forty to bum.
  24. Grab money from his can.
  25. Go back in liquor store.
  26. Grab seltzer.
  27. Talk to clerk.
  28. Buy tabs.
  29. Leave.
  30. Go in alley. Leave.
  31. Talk to shady looking character.
  32. Ask for info about the dealer with Thug Inc.
  33. Agree to find his lighter.
  34. Use knife on drain.
  35. Go in the drain.
  36. Walk left to bring out gator.
  37. Climb ladder.
  38. Go in alley. Man tosses out bag of trash.
  39. Use knife on trashbag.
  40. Go back to trashcan past parking meter, near the bum.
  41. Grab stale bread from trashcan.
  42. Climb ladder.
  43. Combine seltzer with stale bread.
  44. Give to pigeon.
  45. Get hairpin from nest.
  46. Climb down ladder.
  47. (For fun you may want to go up and down the ladder 2-3 times to see the different animations.)
  48. Use hairpin on parking meter.
  49. Go back in the open drain.
  50. Use wrench from trashbag on pipe near ladder.
  51. Climb in hole.
  52. Put old burger on ground below you outside of pipe.
  53. Attack crocodile with pipe.
  54. Use wrench on wheel.
  55. Turn wheel by hand.
  56. Use screwdriver on panel.
  57. Use quarter on panel.
  58. Use knife on panel.
  59. Look in the panel.
  60. Put scrabble tile on missing button.
  61. Push the newly-made scrabble button.
  62. Watch cutscene.
  63. Walk left until you see treasure and the lighter on top of it.
  64. Use the chain with gum to get the lighter.
  65. Leave the sewer.
  66. Talk to the shady character.
  67. Tell him you found his lighter.
  68. Tell him you want to know where Thug Inc.’s place is.
  69. Walk back to the bus stop past the bum’s sleeping place.
  70. Use money on bus to get a ride.
  71. Watch the cutscene.
  72. Follow the flashing sign down the alley.
  73. Watch the cutscene.
  74. The End.

The “original” Johnny Rocketfingers cartoon is quite a bit more crude, not as well drawn and animated, and even more offensive than the second.

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“You lookin’ at me, punk?” – A review of The Godfather Game (XBox)

March 22nd, 2006
XBox The Godfather Game Case - Reviewed Here So I was playing “The Godfather” last night on my friend’s xBox. Besides the fact that the xBox controller is the most evil and insidious invention on the planet, the controls were pretty straightforward and easy to use (but they’re better on a PS2 controller, I’m sure). To start off with, the beginning cinematography is absolutely outstanding! Graphics, story, voice acting, all the elements needed for a great game are present right from the very start.

The story starts off with (extremely minor spoiler) a brief tutourial that ends with a man being gunned down in front of his young kid. Guess who that kid grows up to be? That’s right, he’s our main character and I’ll bet he’ll want a little taste of revenge before it’s over.

To begin with, the world is HUGE, looking like something that came directly from Grand Theft Auto. Starting off you’ll create your own character from menus that look very reminescent of Tiger Woods golf. I didn’t mess with this too much and just hit “randomize” to continue on (God was he ugly lookin’)….but character creation is very in-depth and looks like it could take quite a while to perfect.

Read more…

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Stubbs the Zombie Infinite Life and Ammo Cheats (PC)

March 22nd, 2006

Earlier this year I reviewed the EXCELLENT game “Stubbs the Zombie in Rebel Without a Pulse” by Aspyr. In the review I mentioned that there are some areas I found really difficult to beat without using cheat codes, but I never told you what those cheat codes were or how to use them.

Cheating with Stubbs is pretty easy. First, open the Notepad program on your system and create a new document containing only two lines:

cheat_deathless_player 1
cheat_infinite_ammo 1

Save this file with the name “init.txt” (the exact file name is critical). Move the file into the directory on your PC where Stubbs is installed. If you’re in the right directory, you’ll find “stubbs.exe” there. The next time you launch the game the cheats will be installed.

When you play with cheats enabled, it won’t look like they’re working at first. You’ll only know they’re working when you don’t die after losing all your health.

NOTE: When I last played the game, having the “deathless_player” cheat on prevented me from being able to complete the “poison the water supply” task. The game locked up instead of moving on to the next cut-scene. You will need to save the game before starting that part, then move the “init.txt” file away from the “stubbs.exe” program, and start the game again without cheats to get past that area.

Read more…

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