Mike Salsbury’s Blog

Michael A. Stackpole is a fairly prolific author, having penned a large number of fantasy-themed books, Star Wars novels, Battletech novels, and other works of fiction. He’s had a long and successful career. In other words, the man knows a bit about writing. He runs a web site, stormwolf.com, where he shares (and sells) what he knows and writes. He hosted a seminar at Origins 2009 entitled “The Rules of Writing”, in which he shared his top 5 tips to help aspiring fiction writers improve their craft.

I signed up for one of his sessions. After attending, I wished I had signed up for the others. Stackpole not only understands what beginning fiction writers (and experienced ones) struggle with, he also knows how to communicate solutions to those problems effectively. I think I learned more in the 1-hour session with him than I’ve learned in all the other creative writing education I’ve had. To give you an idea what to expect, I’m going to share some of what I learned from Stackpole during his Origins 2009 session. Out of respect for the author and a desire not to infringe on his copyrights (he sells a document with his 20 rules of writing) or affect his attendance at seminars, I’m only sharing part of the information here. If you want to learn more, and get more detail, I would encourage you to visit his stormwolf.com site or attend one of his seminars.

Stackpole’s first “Rule of Writing” is “Show, Don’t Tell”. This is something you hear in many creative writing classes, but Stackpole did a great job of illustrating the impact of doing it right. For example, a beginning writer will “tell” you what is going on, such as “Tom was mad.” That definitely tells you what’s going on, but you don’t have to actually think about the words. It’s better to “show” your audience how mad Tom is, by saying something like “Tom’s face turned red. He gritted his teeth and slammed his fist on the counter.” In the second example, you have to visualize what’s going on. Not only do you get the point (”Tom is mad”), you can also picture just how mad Tom is.

Stackpole also tells writers to use “Continuity Bolts” in their work to hold the story together and make it seem real. For example, if the main character in your story visits a local bar and has a conversation with the bartender while waiting on a friend to show up, use that conversation and the bartender character elsewhere in the story. Perhaps your main character needs to go to the post office to pick up a package. While he’s waiting in line, he might see the bartender buying stamps. This makes your fictional world seem more real. Similarly, if a television in the bar talks about some news story, the main character might hear people talking about that same story in line at the post office. These elements of continuity make your fictional world seem more complete and consistent, and reward readers for paying attention.

The rule that stuck with me the most was “He said, she said”. This refers to something I’ve always struggled with when I write fiction. I knew it sounded horribly awkward, but I just couldn’t see a way around it. In about two minutes, Stackpole pushed me right past that block and helped me understand what I should do instead. Lots of beginning writers construct dialogue in their stories like this:

“I don’t like it,” Tom said. “You spend too much time at that night club.”

“Don’t be jealous,” Jane told him. “I’m only dancing and hanging out with my girlfriends.”

Tom asked, “Then why did Fred tell me he saw you sitting with that guy from Accounting?”

All that “said”, “told”, and “asked” stuff gets repetitive and irritating after a while. But how do you make it obvious who’s doing the talking? Stackpole explained that one way you can do that effectively is to give your characters a unique style of speaking. Perhaps one character never uses contractions. Maybe one uses a lot of big words, while another chooses smaller, one-syllable ones. The above example might be rewritten as:

“Ticks me off, you goin’ clubbin’ like that every night.”

“That’s silly! I only go to dance and hang out with the girls.”

“Fred saw you sittin’ with a jerk from Accountin’. Why?”

In that example, Tom tends not to say the “g” at the end of words. He also likes to use shorter, more gutteral sounding sentences. Jane uses more complete sentences and a more formal speech pattern.

Another way to identify speakers is to have them name one another, as in “Oh Tom, you’re always saying things like that.”

You can also illustrate who is speaking indirectly, by showing actions they take while they’re speaking, such as “Tom picked at his fingernails.” right before he says something.

You can also hide clues in the context of the characters’ speech, such as “Being the chief of police has its advantages, eh?” If three characters are speaking and only one is the chief of police, you know who they’re talking to. It’s also likely that the next person to speak will be that “chief of police” character. These little clues help the reader figure out who is talking, who’s listening, etc., without having to explicitly use the words “he said”, “she uttered”, “she asked”, etc.

For example, another way you might rewrite the original scene:

He gritted his teeth. “Ticks me off, you goin’ clubbin’ every night, Jane.”

“Oh, Tommy! I only go to dance and hang out with my girlfriends.”

“Fred saw you sittin’ with a jerk from Accountin’. Why?”

In the first line, we know the speaker is male, and he is talking to Jane, even if we don’t know who that speaker is. In the next line, Jane tells us it’s Tom. Now that we’ve established that Tom and Jane are talking, the third and subsequent lines can just deliver dialog until someone new enters the conversation or an existing speaker leaves.

(My examples above aren’t intended to be great writing, just quick illustrations to get the point across.)

Stackpole also shared suggestions for making scenes and dialog do “double duty” and explained the importance of researching the topics you write about. During the seminar, he recommended authors whose work provides good examples of different areas of fiction writing, such as dialogue, plotting, characterization, and

At his seminars, Stackpole sells CD-ROMs which contain PDF (Adobe Reader) files. I purchased the disc for this particular seminar. The PDF contains the 5 rules Stackpole discussed in the seminar, along with another 15. The disc also contains a copy of a back issue of his “The Secrets” newsletter that covers “timely and classic” writing issues. For example, his June 19, 2009, issue (122) discussed how to prepare documents for the Amazon Kindle device

I’m looking forward to attending Stackpole’s seminars at Gen Con Indy 2009 in August and wish him continued success in his career.

admin Books fiction writing, Michael A. Stackpole, Rules of Writing, writing tips

If you’ve never heard of comedian Rodney Carrington, that’s unfortunate. Carrington had a sitcom on television for a couple of years. Before and since then, he’s done a lot of stand-up comedy and other work. Carrington’s comedy is very “blue collar” like that of more well-known comedians like Jeff Foxworthy and Bill Engvall, though more “off color” than Foxworthy or Engvall. His act is part traditional stand-up comedy and part country music. I’ve been a fan of Carrington’s since the first time I heard him perform on The Bob and Tom Show several years ago. His latest comedy album “El Nino Loco” was just released this week.

(If you don’t enjoy off-color humor you may want to stop reading at this point.)

The album starts with the title track (”El Nino Loco”) about a man who’s normally mild and reserved at home, but who gets drunk acts crazy while on a vacation in Mexico (this earning the nickname “El Nino Loco” from the natives). The track is a country song infused with Mexican instruments and backing vocals. The musical style is reminiscent of country singer Marty Robbins. It’s a pleasant song to listen to, but not Rodney’s funniest work by far.

In “Drink More Beer”, Carrington suggests that you can relieve life’s stress by drinking more beer. A typical line from the song: “When your truck keeps overheatin’ cause your radiator’s leakin’, grab the brown bag at your feet ‘n’ drink more beer.” It’s an exaggerated parody of more traditional country songs about drinking, making the ridiculous point that “Bud makes you wiser, Bud Light makes you lighter” and wine coolers make you less likely to be straight.

“If I’m the Only One” tells the story of a loving, dedicated husband troubled by his wife’s “wilder” past and current exploits. Musically, it sounds like a traditional country song. Carrington’s vocal performance is excellent, and makes for a very enjoyable listen if you have any appreciation of country music. Carrington’s stand-up humor slips into this song better than the first two, with lines like “If I’m the only one you ever loved, whose underwear are these? If I’m the only one you ever loved, how come you got so many Mardi Gras beads?” and “I came by your office with some cookies I baked. I walked in and I saw him and his hands were in your hair. Both your feet were pointed in the air. If I’m the only one you ever loved, how come your boss is all over you? If I’m the only one you ever loved, how come his pants are down around his shoes? I’m just askin’ questions, I don’t mean to pry. You got all the answers, so baby just tell me why…” The video for this track was a free iTunes download recently. The video ends with all the scenes of cheating being just a bad dream Rodney had after eating a “Pita Pocket” before going to bed, and his many children (none of whom look like him) being the result of adoption (and of course his wife being faithful after all). It’s definitely the stand-out track on the album.

The next track, “Wish She Would Have Left Quicker” tells how a man’s wife has left him unexpectedly, but “Now I’m just wishin’ that someday she’ll listen ’cause I know just what I would say… I wish she would have left quicker, I would have had lots more fun. There could’ve been shots of tequila, with Sherry and Sheila, bikinis with bottoms - no tops, and one happy man… with no ring on my hand.”

“White Shirts & Rain” discusses how women in wet white T-shirts are more attractive.

In “The Best You’ll Do Tonight” the singer tells us how a very attractive woman in a mini-skirt spent the evening turning heads and flirting with the menu in the bar, but took too long to find the one she wanted to take home and now has to settle for those who are left. Carrington tells her “I know you had intentions of goin’ home with Mr. Right, but it’s last call for alcohol and I’m the best you’ll do tonight.” To help the woman save face, he tells her “Hey, we can leave in separate cars and no one has to know. I hope you don’t live too far from here, my gas tank’s runnin’ low. But if all goes well and I close the deal and you’re lookin’ for a date next week, you can come right back to the same old bar and I’ll be sittin’ in the same old seat.”

In a turn of phrase worthy of the best country songwriters out there, “Bowling Trophy Wife” tells the story of a man who’s found a woman to make him happy even though she “weighs a buck ninety” (190 pounds). He tells us he asked her to marry him when she belched out his name. “Yeah, other guys like trophy wives with tiny little waists, they’ll buy ‘em yachts and caviar to suit their champagne taste. Me, I like ‘em husky with an appetite for life. I thank God for givin’ me my Bowlin’ Trophy Wife.”

The next track on the album tells of the regrets of a man who had lots of women in his life but “got down in the wrong one’s pants” and is “married now, three kids and dog” but says he’d “love to have the chance to go back and do you all”.

“Don’t Tell My Wife” exaggerates on the typical country music theme of a husband away from home who does things he shouldn’t.

The final track, “Funny Man” is a relatively serious one, about how a funny man is sad when he’s away from his family. This is probably based on Carrington’s own life. After his sitcom deal ended, Carrington returned home to Bixby, Oklahoma. He told Tulsa World in August 2008 that “Two years (in Los Angeles) doing that TV show (the sitcom ‘Rodney’ aired on ABC from 2004-06), and I learned my lesson. I don’t want any more of that, and there won’t be anything like that again. Tulsa suits me fine.” He said that “It was a great experience, and I met a lot of great people, but I was actually thrilled when it ended because I got my life back. Before I started doing TV, I had a successful career, and I was making a lot more money touring and selling comedy albums. When I went to do the TV show, I not only increased by 80 hours a week my workload, but I took a pay cut. It was a bad deal all the way around.”

Musically, this a great album to listen to. Carrington’s vocals and the accompanying instrumental work is as good as you’ll find on any current country album. From a comedic standpoint, it isn’t his best work. That’s not to say it’s a “bad” album at all. It’s quite fun to listen to. I find his stand-up (spoken) comedy much funnier than his musical work, though I do enjoy both. His 1998 album “Hangin’ With Rodney” might be his best work overall, as it contains several of his signature bits like “Dancing with a Man”, his country cover of “Purple Rain” and “Kiss” by Prince, “Fred”, “Little Things”, and “Letter to My P*nis.”